Random Thought #4

It's 3 AM and it's finally time for a 20 year-old boy to catch some shuteye. He sprawls out on his bed, ready for sleep, but sleep has been hard to come by the past few days. Instead of sleep comes a series of infamous Kwang-like dry coughs. As soon as he manages to fall asleep, another cough comes, and this cycle plays out through the night. It's going to be a bad night. But then, out of nowhere, with medicine and warm water in hand, the boy's mother has arrived to save the night. 

I know that none of you would have ever suspected that this (lazy) boy was me, but it was. Twice. Last week. It's the little events like these that I'm reminded that I've been blessed with two great parents. It's sad how often I forget sometimes. A large part of my summer has been spent thinking about my parents and (trying to) spend time with them. My mom and dad have been on my mind a whole lot and I've slowly come to realize they show me Christ each and every day.

The other day I was in Evanston visiting a bunch of my Northwestern friends. At one point while hanging out with Peter, Kwang, Jessie, Sophie, and Lexi, we got to reminiscing about our childhoods. Kwang talked about how hard of a time his family had when moving to America. He capped off his story by saying that he always wished that he could give his dad a fishing rod, a luxury good that they simply couldn't afford growing up and a memory that just stuck with him throughout the years. Man, after hearing that, I couldn't help but think about my mom and dad.  There are so many times that I've had that similar thought cross my mind.

My parents are by far the most sacrificial people I know. My mom wakes up early (sometimes even in the middle of the night) and sleeps late all for the sake of the family. She serves day in and day out with a willing heart. And what gets me the most is that she chooses to save rather than spend on even the simplest and cheapest of life's pleasures for herself. She cooks, yet is the one who eats the leftovers, and she loves with such a big heart. My dad, on the other hand, works tirelessly and faithfully at his job when he knows that he's capable of so much more. (After all, he is a genius.) He works in a lab when he loves nothing more than to talk to people. He bikes to the train station, even though he can drive to work, just so I can use it. He walks to work, even though it's 100 degrees outside. The list goes on and on. 

As a recipient of all these sacrifices, I feel that it'd only be right to show my parents that it was worth it. If only I could buy my mom a delicious gourmet meal to eat, if only I could buy my mom all the clothes in the world, if only I could buy my mom a computer that wasn't 10 years old, if only I could buy my dad a nice bike to ride to work, if only I could make my dad a greenhouse in the backyard to work in, if only I could surround my dad with people that love on him and reciprocate his energy, maybe that will show them.

And yet, therein lies my problem. It is when I think these if only statements that I need to stop and ask myself what it is that I want the most for my parents. The italicized statements make it clear that what I want most for them is comfort. Comfort to know that their lives have been meaningful and that their sacrifices have been more than worth it. clearly reflect my desire a greater degree of comfort in my parents' lives. It's funny because after thinking about that, I wonder how much comfort the things I wanted above would actually provide. A gourmet meal would probably last an hour. Clothes and a greenhouse would probably last a couple years. 

Too often do I seek to be the solution rather than point to the solution. The things of the world can only satisfy and comfort for so long. God has given me the one true gift that can provide comfort for all of eternity. It's time for a change of perspective. If only I could give my parents (my dad particularly) Jesus. 

Thank You for the best parents. Thank You that my family has been a part of the plan since day one. I'm so grateful for all the hardships they had to endure to raise me and for their example of humility and sacrifice through it all. I pray that as we continue to do life together this summer and beyond that You would continue to grow us together as a family and break down the walls that keep us from growing closer. Give me an urgency as well as an opportunity to share who You are and what You've been doing in my life. Grant me the boldness to follow through. Be the ultimate comfort to Mom and Dad and show me how to love them more each day. In Jesus' name. Amen.